the blog.

Runaway A Road Adventure

We circled for some time without doing much damage on either side; the long, straight, needle-like swords flashing in the sunlight, and ringing out upon the stillness as they crashed together with each effective parry.

I was only partially successful, as a sharp pain in my left shoulder attested, but in the sweep of my glance as I sought to again locate my adversary, a sight met my astonished gaze which paid me well for the wound the temporary blindness had caused me.

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Scrap Surf

You don't know how to do any of those. It's a T. It goes "tuh". Okay, I like a challenge. Son, as your lawyer, I declare y'all are in a 12-piece bucket o' trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin' up that ol' mess you caused. I feel like I was mauled by Jesus. Tell her you just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating.

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All In Our Head

It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. Also he got a race car. Is any of this getting through to you? I wish! It's a nickel. Okay, it's 500 dollars, you have no choice of carrier, the battery can't hold the charge and the reception isn't very…

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Smaller Plate

Oh God, what have I done? All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that's why I'm transferring to business school! Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you!

Tell her you just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. You're going to do his laundry? They're like sex, except I'm having them! I daresay that Fry has discovered the smelliest object in the known universe!

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Alice On The Roof

I'm sorry, guys. I never meant to hurt you. Just to destroy everything you ever believed in. You don't know how to do any of those. But existing is basically all I do! No, she'll probably make me do it. Meh.

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A Story About Nothing

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A problem is a chance for you to do your best. Duke Ellington